Disgaea

Sighs.. Jack recommended this anime to me, he said it was nice and he liked it alot. I was like..
"Really? What's the anime about?"
"Some demon king boy called Laharl and some angel girl call Flonne,'s funny adventure. It's based on a ps game."
"Really? Interesting.."
I'd watch ep1.. it looked kinda promising besides some unnecessary characters interrupting the flow of the anime once awhile and which was suppose to uplift the comical atmosphere of the anime but failed miserably 'cause it's just plain L-A-M-E. The angel girl is just plain retard.
-_- Jack, are you sure it's nice?

Well, it's just only a 12-episode anime and Jack said that the demon king boy would fall for the angel girl. I'll wait.... and wait...
The only episode which was really nice, in my most humble opinion, was the one about the demon boy's mum. How she was actually by his side eventhough she was dead. Sorry, I know it's a spoiler. When she finally had her chance to be reborn, she revealed who she was and there was a touching scene between her and Laharl. Bah! Sad, I teared...almost..

After I had raced to finish the 12 episode anime in just 6hrs within 3 days time, I just felt like killing Jack along with the producers of Disgaea... DISAPPOINTMENT CAPITAL LETTERS! What?! I don't see any plot development along the way. And during the last episode, where Flonne had disintegrated into thin air, he cried and said "Is this what you called love!?" *bangs head multiple times on table* When in the world did he fall for her?! *pulls hair from head* I'm just, speechless.......

The only credit I would give is to the voice actress for Laharl, she did a real good job. Hearing his tone when he says, "Ah ho ka!?", "Urusai!", "Damare!", "Konoyaro!!" it was really entertaining.
URGH... and I actually had high hopes for that game when I saw a preview of Disgaea 2 for playstation 2.. Now, I don't think I'm going to buy that game anymore.

But perhaps, I'm going to watch Disgaea 2, if there's an anime for it. At least it looks much more sensible then Disgaea 1. Hopefully.....

Click here for Disgaea 2 Preview
Erm.. I take back my word about it being sensible

Click title for wikipedia's Disgaea link

Anti-Climax-er

Pre-random distortion mode... warning warning.....

2 years ago, it was during Chinese New Year, I think, we ( Lee Yan, Lynnie, Mei Kee & me..can't remember much) went to Siew Lee's house. She told me about her new ps2 game, Fatal Frame 2, which caught my interest. I was wondering, how in the world could a Japanese horror game be played?

Neat! So I told one of my bravest friend to play on my behalf. I'm smart, ain't I? I know I am. *grins* The opening movie was....dark. Argh, all the main character had to do was walk a dark path in the forest for like.. 2-3 mins?! It was long and there was no background music no nothing, only irritating cicadas' sound. Gosh! This is insane, there should at least be creepy music like Silent Hill....but cicadas!?

When the character hits a checkpoint, which was invisible by the way, a movie was activated, she saw a white lady standing at a Japanese arch-like thingy with her back facing the player, then, chang chang chang! She was floating and then she slowly turned her head. That's when my friend suddenly said, " The controller is vibrating!" ARGH!! I closed my eyes. So, I no see face, no see nothing. Yeah anti-climax, I know..

Then my friend told me it's over. Okie, not so bad, so far with eyes closed. So she took a turn and the character sort of entered into mission 1 or chapter 1 or whatever. She entered a village, hits a another invisible checkpoint and another movie gets auto-played. Gosh!! The stupid game has invisible checkpoints everywhere!! Then I couldnt take it anymore. Please shut it off and never touch the game again for the goodness of mankind everywhere, thank you very much.
Anti-climax again? Yeah, I've only played, more like only seen 15 - 20 mins of the game. Gosh, even typing this out gives me the chills.... *turns to look behind her* Nobody behind me, phew. Just the clown....

I had a dream last night, got an unexpected call from a friend who asked me whether I would be home during summer break? It was weird because I would had never expected a call back home from him. Waaah?! I..... I..... *was about to answer his question in the dream*
And I woke up... by a stupid sms from 3G. @%!$@#!*&

What an anti-climax right.. yeap that's me...

I ish Whining

Woot! Finally exam is over! It's time to burn them papers! BURN PAPERS THAT HAVE BEEN CAUSING ME MISERY FOR 3 YEARS!!BURN!! BURN!! BURN!! Erm..wait... I might have to retake the whole unit if I ever fail.... NO! NO! STOP THE BURNING! PUT OUT THE FIRE! AAARGH!!

*sighs loudly*

Exam had just passed by like that. And I'm doomed by one, probably two papers. GARH!! WHY!? Can't believe all the hard work that I'd put in, everything just turned to toxic nuclear waste, burnt in the neverending fire of doom, goes swirling down the vortex of darkness. Did I not worked hard enough? Hmmmm.... Now that's a question...

All my planned neighbourhood terrorism, mamak outings and drag-ings all gone down the drain!! NOOOOOO.. my sweet sweet plans! ARGH!! My insanity! Where are you going?! COME BACK!! *hoarse whispers*
Nie nie... looks like.. cheese naan outing have to postpone again....we can't go Borders to read books for free also, can't go red box to sing DBSK songs yet... YET!!

Gosh..I'm going to start going random distortion mode anytime soon... Somebody buy me a ps2, an xbox, nintendo, whatever,keep me busy..anything!




Nah..come to think about it, screwdrivers are much more fun, aren't they... MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Beautiful Thing

Sometimes I feel like taking out the lyrics from a song and adding my own inside. Same goes to Beautiful Thing by Xiah. It sounded so mellow, so sad and yet beautiful at the same time. As I set the song on repeat mode, I noticed that his sing in a quavery style, something like Jacky Cheung's style but nicer ( of course...*winks*). It seemed like he's putting up a lot of effort singing this song because it's so sad. HHmm.. interesting. "Of course la! Chega, Junsu wah!" says Pit Yin. *snickers*



The one on youtube has the translated lyrics. Beautiful and deep, my type of song. Anyways.... I might as well try to put in my own lyrics.



It feels like a beautiful thing
Mysterious as it is, we'll never know
Why does it that the tears fall so?
Is an answer which I would never know

Sun will still sets, Birds will still fly
Time would still passes us by,
But this scene in my time had just stopped
Right in this heart, of mine. Oh~

Time of love, Crimson red roses.
A flower surrounded by thorns
Looking up into the sky, as the sun rests high above my head
Mocking me so with its warmth on my cheeks
Gimme a chance to unwind time

Oooh~

Wind will still blow, Rivers will still flow
Seasons would still come and go
Restlessness, which can't be explained
Rests at the bottom of fears

The silver light, beckons to me,
Hearing only the silence's echo
Walking in the mist, as the time draws nigh
I'm sending out my call to you.


((SEE! I have talent for this! *winks winks*))

The 'MitChi' Duo

After a few insane outings with Pit Yin, I had come to a conclusion that we should not be together in places where LOTS of people hang out, eg. PERTH CITY. Gosh, we actually scare the people around us. Blimey' bunch of crazy chinks! Meeps, this is not good for my reputation. I'd received a number of weird stares from them.
Meeps, too loud. Sorrie, sorrie it was the sugar level in my blood. Hehe *feigns innocence*

There was once where she came by the shop to wait for me to finish up my work and go to Mcdee's and talk more 'bout JaeJung and 'the fella', ehem, ex-see-kius mi *feigns kawaii-ness* It's Junsu. Mi ahn neh, Pit Yin shi and also Nie Nie. Ekekeke.. I got all excited because it was about 30 mins more 'til I get off work. My memory is actually still hazy, truly hazy...seriously hazy! We were screaming 'bout something and all of a sudden she got all quiet and points to my behind. ARGH!I'd embarrassed myself in front of a customer. Great, I'd bet he would tell others 'You know, that shop at William St.? Yeah, that souvenir shop. It has got some really weird crazy chink in there. That shop is off-limits for me, man. I never wanna go near there again, ever!' Oh, joy!
Ah, could feel my insanity coming back to me. Hey, where have you been, my long lost buddy? It's been awhile. It's great to have you back, yeah from the bottom of my heart.

Even in Mcdee's we scare the living daylight or shall I say, the bright neon nightlight out of them. Is Perth that silent that even with our controlled excitedness in our voices it still can be heard gazillion miles away? I see the possibilty of one day, that both me and Pit Yin's picture will be on Mcdee's entrance. A ban notice that reads : Caution. Please do not let these two into any Mcdonald's premises within Perth City. These two are notorious for scaring customers with their loud obnoxious laughters and singing. As Pit Yin would say, "SWEAT!".

The best place of course would be the comfort of my own room, with my landlord out of the house. EHEM. We were watching the live performance for 'O' Jung Ban Hap with a killer surround sound system. The volume, the sound system *holds a thumb up*
Okie la... it's just a plain lopek speaker, but still! Speaker wei... *coughs* And as I was saying, yeah.. we were screaming in my room, "JAE JUNG AH! WAH CHEGA JUNSU!" A bunch of crazy dudettes.. EH, nie nie! What mosquito on the head now?!

We even talk to each other in Korean; even with limited vocabulary we still can laugh just by saying, "Mou?!", "Mi Ahn Neh", "Yi Sah Heh" and "Kwaen Chen Na Yo?". Can you believe that?! Yeah, I know. Totally 'gila' beyond help. HEY!! I can hear somebody punching the telephone number to Hospital Bah'gia. EH! I'm Not Crazy!! I'M NOT! SERIOUSLY, I'M NOT! CHIN CHA I'M NOT MITCHI!! Okie, fine... I need immediate medical attention.

Hehe, Lynnie, when I get back let's terrorise the neighbourhood with DBSK ya. This time I'm going to revamp the car's speaker. Muahahahaha! BEWARE PENDUDUK TAMAN YARL!! Yeah, we'll start at Tmn Yarl then we'll upgrade to your garden yeah. Bukit Puchong... MUAHAHAHA! BEWARE PENDUDUK TAMAN BUKIT PUCHONG!! Weeiii.. don't like that la, why want to call the police..just singing only what....relaks la..

Eh, Pit Yin ah, let's continue again after exam ah... Don't go back for summer, you know. You'll sure get a job here wan... *grins evilly* Then we can Dong Bang here la. I don't want to Dong Bang alone no fun la. Garr!!!
It's all good fun. I'll be waiting for you to come with all your DBSK files. I will clean up my room. It won't look like a 'sarang' anymore. Hehe...Yesh, my room looks like a sarang now. Anybody has a problem with that!? Assignment month wa.....

Sighs... back to my attempt to focus on my assignments.
Jaejung ah...saranghamnida... *wipes drool*

11 October

*Grins as wide as the Cheshire Cat*

It's a wonderful day, and I thank God for the weather,
It's a wonderful day, Living it for my Lord. La la la la ~

Ahh... the flowers, how they bloom so beautifully. Birds chirping their happy tunes.
Yeah, and me rambling about non-sensesical stuffs...... just.... weird.

Was in the midst of dreaming of DBSK when I heard a knock on the door. It sounded like a catastrophe had just happened. It's either I'd pretend not to hear it and continue sleeping or else open the door and with arms wide open, receive whatever the damnation had happened.

I had least expected to see a cake being put in front of my disorientated face with Amanda, Pit Yin & Julia standing there singing Happy Birthday. *thought bubbles with the word 'embarrased' and 'touched' appears* All i could think of is 'My gosh!!How did they know?!' and the night before I was unconsciously singing "Sheng re kuai le, wo dui zhi ci shou..." and I got sounding from Amanda. Sorry... ekekekeke * smiles cheekily*

I blew the candles, made a wish and cut the cake in a semi-conscious state with my brain still far far away in dreamland. Argh! And they were busy snapping pictures of my messed up face and hair.... *speechles* not to mentioned my nest-like room.....
You'd got to be kidding me.... there's no way I'm going to show you my just-woke-up-with-hair-and-face-messed-up pics.
This, is good enough of a picture of me...




My Gosh, and Amanda is one of the mastermind behind this. How could I be so oblivious?!! GAR!
We had fun watching X-Man Pt.2 a korean gameshow. Julia couldn't take her eyes off the screen 'cause she was too focused on her Yunho. LOL! Thank You so much, guys! You made me smiled the first half of the day... hahahahahahaha....
(The girls : Amanda on the bed, Julia, me and Pit Yin)




When to Maggie's house that night to do my renunciation. After a nice surprise, I can go through renunciation without a sweat. Right..........
Lemme tell you guys, if you wanna play poker, never play with Amanda and Maggie. You'll lose all your property in a blink of an eye. It's that or either I'm just plain oblivious....in simple words, dumb -_- I think that's it... how could I not know, when her room mate, Priscilla knocked on her door for no apparent reason, and she made a phone call asking Stan to picked me up, and when she asked me to come out of her room but to leave my bag behind... Wah?!?!

I was truly touched that they somehow remembered although I specifically told Amanda not to tell anyone. *shoots daggers from eyes* Was shocked to see Katherine who had just came back from Brunei, Stanley, Boon Wai who was playing the guitar and Philip.. Words could not express how thankful I am to have all of you guys in my life. This is how I smiled for the 2nd half of the day.

Of all my birthday celebration that I had ever had, these are the best I ever had and will always remember.

THANK YOU SO MUCH GUYS!!

White Blog

How in the world did my white blog became a grey blog, almost black? It was suppose to contain animes' and movies' review but it ended up distorted.
Cooooool!
Unlike my Random Distortions which I know it's really dark, I guess....*does a little thinking*
Especially my post about Gaia. That's my favourite! I like the part where I wrote about pressing the mini screwdriver into the back of your fingers. Hard enough that you could slice the skin open just by dragging it across the joint. HAHAHHAHAHA! And also about where you dig through the flesh and everything you can see the white of your bone.Yeah, that's right! The cartilage!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!! Blood tasting like iron! Remember?! HAHAHA...HAHAHA.....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Ehem *coughs coughs* sorry. White blog, white blog. *breathing in deep breaths*

Note to self : This is a white blog.

My Birthday Pressie!

Puuurrrsss....... slightly subdued now...hehehehehe
Felt a lot better now since the past few weeks back. All thanks to my darling, Lynnie! Saranghae, Lynnie!! She bought me Tohoshinki's album; Heart, Mind and Soul as an advanced birthday present for me. ARGH!! This the best ever present since the last DCTalk's album you bought me.. MUACKS!!

'TVXQ (Tong Vfang Xien Qi) is a Korean boy band that has gained popularity in Japan, Taiwan, China, and other East-Asian countries. Today, it has become one of Asia's most influential pop groups, and is one of the top groups of the Korean Wave. TVXQ, their international name, is referred to by various other names. Its Korean title is Dong Bang Shin Ki (or Gi) '(동방신기)', which is abbreviated to DBSK (or DBSG). The Japanese equivalent is Tōhōshinki '(東方神起)', which is abbreviated to THSK. The group debuted in South Korea, Japan, Taiwan, and China throughout 2004. TVXQ is composed of five male members specializing in the areas of dance, A cappella, various drama acting, and pop with an R&B vibe.' Source from wikipedia.org

Don't know why but there's this craze going on ever since they came to Malaysia to perform, or it's just me. Just like how Lynnie would say, spreading the loooove. Well done my young padawan. You had recruited more minions to spread my craze and one day we will overthrow CAssiopeia! MUahahahha *thunders roars and lightning flashes in the background*. Once we have recruited enough, we can be the female alter ego of DBSK. Wahakakak..been practising all their songs diligently day and night. Ngek ngek ngek!

Ehem, I'm also extending my legion here in Perth, with my trustee sidekick, Pit Yin. We have this secret thingy that whenever she sees me, she's going to call me JaeJung hyung, and I'm going to call her Junsu. Yeah, I'm totally psychedelic over them. Call me insane but anything to do with DBSK,please count me in!

Rising Sun was the first MV that I'd watched and was captivated by them. Their dance steps are awesome and so damn difficult to follow at the same time, believe me. Makes me wanna take up hip hop lessons so I could dance like them. *Grins.....*

Now, I'm going to count the days when I get back to Malaysia and listen to my Tohoshinki album! And......*evil snickers* do more insane stuff with Lyn and this time it's all got to do with DBSK! I'm beginning to sound like a Korean fan-crazed girl. I can't help it!!! At least they're not some lame boyband, kie! They really can sing and their A cappella's are damn good, know!

Kamsah hamida, Nie Nie! Saranghamida, JaeJung!! *drools*

Click title to watch DBSK's Rising Sun MV

Emo Mode

Hey World,

It's me again. Yeah, I'm back to tell more crap, more rubbish, more non-educational neither it's informative at all to the people of the world. Yes, it's all just plain rubbish not even worth your time reading it. Worse still, utter sick nonsense.

When I pretend everything is what I want it to be

I look exactly like what you'd always wanted to see

Feeling so subdued over here. Total freedom yet I can't do what I want? This is a joke. I'm being stripped of what I enjoy doing most and who I enjoy being with most. In short, my actual 'freedom'.

When I pretend, I can’t forget about the criminal I am

Stealing second after second just cause I know I can

but I can’t pretend this is the way it’ll stay I’m just

(trying to bend the truth)

Putting on a fake smile and a fake attitude to please the people around me. Ah, joy! That's hard work, dammit! And no one appreciates it. How pathetic of me, putting up the clown act all for nothing. Changing oneself to conform to the society!? Heh!

I can’t pretend I’m who you want me to be, so I’m

(Lying my way from you)No no turning back now

I wanna be pushed aside so let me go

Let me take back my life,I’d rather be all alone

Anywhere on my own cuz I can see

(The very worst part of you is me)

Am I not good enough for you, world!? What more do you want?! Oh, I forgot, nothing is ever good enough for you. You are never ever satisfied with anything. Never knowing what the word 'contented' means.

I remember what they taught to me

Remember condescending talk of who I ought to be

Remember listening to all of that and this again

So I pretended up a person who was fittin’ in

And now you think this person really is me and I’m

(Trying to bend the truth)

But the more I push the more I'm pulling away 'cuz I'm

(Lying my way from you)

Sssshh... just hush for awhile. I need to re-contemplate the meaning of my puny existence. Or should I just lie to myself again, like I always do....

Wolf's Rain

(Spoiler Warning)
Wolf’s Rain talks about a world where wolfs are extinct and nobody knows how or what they looked like. In order to survive, they create an illusion where humans would see them as a regular human too. It talks about the journey of four wolfs; Kiba, Tsume, Hige and Toboe on their quest to find the lunar maiden who will lead them to rakuen(paradise). Consisting of 30 episodes with the last 3 episodes as OVAs.

At the very beginning of the anime, it was so slow and a little boring, minus the part where Kiba and Tsume were fighting. Well, in the beginning it tells how each of them got together and how they found the lunar maiden, Cheza; made from the alchemization of a lunar flower. Hmm.. actually I think she’s kinda ugly with red bloodshot eyes. Well, as the story progresses into the middle, it got really interesting where you just have to watch the next episode.

In the middle of the series, Toboe, the youngest of the pack, had sort of a flashback where he had accidently killed his own mistress merely just by causing her to fell over because he sort of pushed her down. He was looking at her motionless body unable to comprehend that he had just killed her. T_T Toboe…..
Toboe had always wanted human’s love and attention, so he sacrificed himself for another person’s master. He died in the arms of the man, showing that he finally found his own paradise where he was sitting in the meadows next to his human grandmother. Toboe T_T… It was really damn sad wei...

The ending was really unexpected. All the wolfs died one by one, T_T What really gripped me was the relationship between Kiba and Cheza. T_T
“What do I’ve left to protect if you’re gone?” Kibaaaa….. T_T
Although in the beginning, Kiba did seem a little over-possessive of Cheza that he kinda looked insane at one point.

It’s a good anime but depressing at the same time. It also forces your brain to think because some scenes wouldn't make sense at all unless you think. Yeap, I know it's hard work for some of us. Only watch it if you’re not depressed.. haha.. Ps: Have lots of tissue with you.

Here's a picture of Kiba chomping into his delicious strawberry-filling bun.
Yum yum! Ngek ngek ngek!

Sayonara Solitaire (Chrono Crusade)

Would you give me another chance?
Would you give me one more day?
Would you give me another minute?
If only I could tell you the words which I'd never had the courage to say.
If only I could show you the feelings which I'd hide so deep within me.
If only words could express everything.
Tell me if our meeting was wrong.
Tell me if everything meant nothing.
Pain is something we both knew too well, something which has became part of who we are.

The sunset view which we love so much, is out of sight now.

The one last moment

With you.

Sayonara, Solitaire.

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Daisy 2006

“I'd built that bridge for you. But I didn’t know that I would be building it for you and him.”

Sitting in the airplane could really be agonizing at times, especially when you’re hoping that someone cute would be seating next to you but instead it’s somebody either old, weird or just…. *sighs and shrugs* Well, life is full of surprises. Everything on the movie channel was really sucky, no nice recent movies, disappointed with MAS *shakes head* Then this one particular Korean movie looks cool. ‘Daisy’. Hmm… a killer and a cop falls for the same girl… interesting,must be bloody. *grins evilly*

Daisy tells the story of a hired assassin, a street painter and a cop where both of them falls for the same girl. As you can guess, it has a nice tragic ending where everyone dies. That’s my kind of story. Die! Die! DIE!! Ehem.. no I’m not sick, seriously! *smiles innocently*

Everyday at 4.15pm, someone would send her a pot of daisies at her doorstep, but would never show himself to her.
“Who is this person who sends me flowers? Why doesn’t he shows himself to me?”
He follows her wherever she goes, looking from afar. Copying everything she does. One day, she meets a cop, who so happened dropped by and asked her to paint a portrait of him, and coincidently has a pot of daisy with him.
”Who is this guy who is making her smile like that?”

I’m not an artsy movie person. In fact, I kinda hate artsy movie ‘cause it always seem to test my patience. But Daisy is really different, it’s artsy, beautiful, sad, tragic, you name it. Jeun Ji Hyun from ‘My Sassy Girl’, Jeung Woo Sung (A Moment to Remember) and Lee Sung Jae protrayed their characters really well you could almost feel the pain the characters go through. No wonder everyone’s into Korean film these days. *rubs chin* Daisy is now in my wishlist and I’m now anxiously waiting for the DVD to be released.

The official website : www.daisy2006.com
Daisy's AsianFanFanatic forum: http://asianfanatics.net/forum/lofiversion/index.php/t138940.html

(Click the title to view trailer)

El Tango de Roxanne

His eyes upon your face

His hand upon your hand

His lips caress your skin

IT'S MORE THAN I CAN STAND!!

Why does my heart cry?
Feelings I can't fight,

You're free to leave me but

Just don't deceive me and

Please, believe me when I say

I love you......

Muahahaha...I love watching tragic lovers. Yesh, I'm a sadist. Big time sadist as well. This is my favourite scene and song in Moulin Rouge. Click the title to watch the scene on Youtube. *winks*

The sad melodious voice; painfully singing each line as each word slowly kills the inside of him, more and more.

The sharp octave and the pizzicatto waves of the violins, tugging and pulling the broken hearts, teasing them to hold on or to let go.
The augmented choir in the background, chanting the sad chorus, pulling both their spirits to a bottomless pit.
The melancholic hitting of the piano keys; mocking the pain in their hearts, laughing at their misery, smilling at their sufferings.
The solemn guitar plucking; tapping each string, picking on each line of pain etched in the heart.
The tango dancers, tracing every step of sorrow, dancing a performance of nightmare.
The sombre orchestra; making loud the lovers' misery, playing out their sad symphony for all to hear.
The dark hidden audience, gives a standing ovation, impressed at the masquerade that is being played, taking delight in their sufferings; laughing, jeering, sneering silently as they clap their silent applause.
As the curtain falls, the ringmaster smiles, holding the strings of his puppets.

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A note to Kalen from Leah(Gaia)

Nah, I’m not into fanfict. Just rambling, that’s all.
Immortals Vs. Undead (Gaia)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Kalen,

Do you know why we can’t be together? You’re a living mortal and I’m an undead. This unholy union will bring nothing but misery. I’d lived for years seeing misery and pain you can’t comprehend. All the times, I’d pushed you away, why do you think it is so? It’s simply because you and I can’t be together and will never ever. I’d lived far too long I’d forgotten what emotion is like. Love is just a silly game that kids play. It means nothing to me now; love brings me nowhere, not where I am today. I take pride in sorrow, fear and pain. Something which you, as a mortal, will never ever understand. How can you understand a non-living creature like me? Nor will I make you one, if the only purpose of this transformation is for this silliness. There’s no joy in being an undead; cursed to being just an empty soulless body that forever wanders the face of the earth, forever seeking for that soul which they had sold and could never be regain, eternally.
Soren leader, you have your own duties to perform, don’t you? Are you just going to abandon your own people just for me? I doubt so. I will not mark you either, seeing as there’re no significant gains which I can get out of marking a Soren leader. We, the undead, do not need the Sorens as our frontline warriors. If this war must come to be, you and I will be on different sides, even if it means having the Lycans and the Methians against us. I will see to the death of the Cirrus, by killing her with my own hands, if I'd to be slayed in exchange for that.


It’s a shame, if only I had met you sooner. If only I had met you when I was still alive. I would have learned what love is, from you.

Common Senseless Thoughts

Destroyer of Worlds (Gaia)
Helena Marionette stares off into space as she sits alone in her office looking out of her 80-storey building.
'Thalia has been complaining alot. Why doesn't she understand my position? Why doesn't she understand me? And she says I do not understand her?!' she thought to herself, sighing louder than usual. As Earth's leader, she musn't show any signs of weakness, any hint of fear, not anything that would jeopardise the planet. Not when you have the Alverians and the Raghuls eyeing on your planet, waiting anxiously for just one wrong move to disperse Earth into nothingness. Intuition tells her that war is inevitable.
'If the Alverians or the Raghuls were to come, we humans will not give up without a fight. I hope that one day, you would understand me because you are my family'.
She took out an empty sheet of paper and started to pen down her thoughts:-

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Feeling a little jaded with mankind. Everybody always wants to be understood, wants to put first, this and that yaddi yadda, 'ME! ME! ME!'. Where's the empathy? Is it only that the weaklings show empathy? Just because they try to empathise with the world that they are taken advantage of and made it seemed like a weakness. The feeling of being trampled over and over again. Oh, joy! It's annoying that it's so sickening. They just swallow in their pride and sorrow while crying silently in the corner. Do you even hear them whine? No, perhaps the world is just too ignorant to notice it. Or perhaps I should say, blind?! What about those who wanted to whine?! They do have something to complaint about, don't they?! Everybody have something they're not contented at, right?! Why is it that all their words are just muffled out by those who're just good at making a mountain out of a molehill.

You shut your mouth just for a puny hill? Is it worth it?
I don't know, it just seemed that what I'd to say is not important at all.
So you just agreed to be pushed aside?
Am I given an option!? Can I just shout out all my feelings without a single care in the world?!
You could.. But I try not to.
Why do you choose to tolerate all this?!
I've been doing it all my life that it had become who I am now. Been brought up with a 'your thought does not matter at all' way.Yeah, so just go ahead and mow all my feelings down with your bulldozer. I had a lifetime training for it. Bring it on!!
What would you give so that they would just open their eyes, shut up and listen?
Everything..
If it's sympathy you're giving me, then just save it for yourself. I don't need it. I know I'd hurt people sometimes but do they know that they have hurt me too?
But perhaps, it is me, not being understanding enough. It's a joke then, if I want the world to understand me.


I put on such good show that the world can't see the person behind the mask. Or would they prefer the mask instead?
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Reaching for the lighter in the drawer, she swiftly lighted the piece of paper. She threw it into an ash tray, watching it burn slowly. Now her thoughts will never be heard.

Fen Lie(Split Apart) - Jay

This is the time where the existence of assignments and exams are just to make your life miserable. You so easily slipped in and out of depression just like that. Was watching Jay's video clip on youtube on Saturday night (more like Sunday morning) because I couldn't do a single thing and ended up not sleeping at all. The video clip showed Jay in highschool about how a loner he was and a rebel as well. The old school where he was from, how he sat in class alone dreading each day he's there. Walking back the same route to and fro to school somehow becomes so routine-like that it's just so sickening. Watching back the video clip made me miss my highschool life so much as well as home. Was I a loner back then? Not really, at times though. Was I a rebel? Definitely, I don't take no orders from nobody. I do what I want and I do what I like.

Watching back the video clip makes me remember the times when I was in highschool, not doing my work, going against rules;that was my favourite, although i was a prefect.. hahaha. Who cares?! The discipline teacher wasn't doing her job as well. Remember staying back at school just so that i don't have to go home early. Walking to the opposite shoplots with friends and just patronising the bookshops there, reading their comics, touching all the stuff in there. The bookshop aunty will be glaring at us. Hahaha..sue me, like I care. I dread every Tuesday, just because it was the day i had my organ class. I would go, 'Ugh.. call me, call me and postpone the class, pleeeeeeasee..'. I miss sitting in the classroom, next to a classmate. "Heys, did you do this? Can i borrow your notes ah? I belanja you pepsi 50cents later." I remember going down to the canteen and buying a plate of 70cents nasi lemak without meat but with curry sauce. I miss seeing the green blackboard where the teacher still uses the old white chalk to write her notes on it. Still remember sitting in class while watching the teacher write on the blackboard. 'How long more do I have to see this stupid green piece of wood. It's sickening me.'

Sports' day be the best 'cause that's where I get to be in-charge with lots of stuff and it made me feel really important. Listening to the sickening marching tune which is repeated like almost every year,now i could not really remember the tune at all. I miss being a unit leader to my juniors,it was fun while it lasted, sorry guys if I'd ever did anything wrong or hurt your feelings. I miss the prefect gathering where i was in-charge with games,how all of us anticipate the last event which was the dance event *snickers* that was really a brilliant idea, Wen Jac. Now that I could no longer be part of that event, it's sad. I miss walking over the 5 Sains 3 to join the club. How we relate to each other; I'm not alone. Walking over to 5Sains2 and being to bullied by Chee Kai!? I miss that too, sometimes only. I miss everytime when Wai Yee and Gak Wai is free, they'll come over with their guitar and just chat in the class until the teacher comes.

I miss going to Chemistry lab, watching Andrew burnt his finger with Barium Sulfide was funny. I miss going to Biology lab, donating saliva wasn't easy, seriously. Physics lab, uhm.. not really though, I couldn't understand a word he's saying, literally. I miss eating in class, not caring whether the teacher had something to say or not. LOL! I even walked in once in the middle of the class while the teacher was teaching. Terrible student! Hehe >.<>.< . The scrabble competition was the coolest event I ever joined, well probably the only national event I guess. We make the best team; me, Indrani, Swee Shean and Charlene. Hey! 5th in whole of KL you know, don't play play! I miss singing 'Hari Ini Ku rasa Bahagia' in CF, making it the theme song for the year. CHee Kai and his gang would go "Again this song ah!?"

I miss going out recess 15 mins early with Sangeetha and Swee Shean. I miss 'Hari Terbuka' where our parents come to get our report card, we'll be sweating wondering what the teacher would say to our parents. If it was something bad, then my papa would say, "Go home eat rotan!" LOL! Nah, he'd never said that at all 'cause I was a good girl. *angelic halo glows on head* I miss going "OI Suki!!" *whacks him on the arm* and we'll speak in malay instead of chinese, weird but unique. Hehe! I miss listening to the class monitor says " Bangun! Selamat Sejahtera, Cikgu!" I miss playing gold dust and water on days where my classmates go crazy. Yesh, we're all crazy. Miss being teased by them, though not all the time. I miss how my friends would help me to tie my tie. Thank you, guys! I still suck at it. Thank you Mei Kee, Lee Yan, Siew Lee and Lynnie for that wonderful experience. The confilcts, the joy, the laughter, everything. I really miss you guys. Perhaps, for this coming holidays, I'm going to go back to school and sit there reminiscing good ol'stuff that we guys use to do.. hehe.
Highschool days was one of the best and nothing could come close to that experience.

Click title for Jay's Fen Lie(分裂) MTV

Kyssa's Thought

Speaking on behalf of one of my alter-egos, Kyssa (Gaia):

It's funny how somehow you're in a situation where you're so torn, you just don't know what you want anymore. Everyday you're just going through an inner turmoil where you are at war with yourself. Your heart tells you another thing and your brain tries to influence you with another. This is just so weird. You just don't want to do it for the fear of failing, rejection and yet if you don't do it, you'll never know the answer, FOR LIFE!! I hate it how you're so stuck and you just go on living in denial. Am I living in denial, yes.. have always been.

I had missed so many opportunities, so many stuff just because of one bloody word, FEAR! Guess I've just said goodbye to one already. The risk of putting myself in an open field where I'm just one easy target. And I just got shot dead, by telling him what I want a guy to do. And dammit, he just did nothing. Sad but oh well, life's just gotta go on. Guess I've finally got my answer all this years. I don't want to wait for you anymore. Almost on the verge of forgeting you but you just had to appear out of nowhere. Revoking the memories of you in me. Why!?

I feel so tired. Why is it that I have to put on a mask every time I see you. Why is it that every time we see each other, you’ll be playing this mind tricks with me. Can’t you see, can’t you see that I do feel for you. Why is it that you trapped me in your stupid games? Why is it that I still fall for it knowing it’s a trap. Why is it that you break my heart time after time but I still forgive you? Why is it that you break your promise time after time yet I still forgive you? Why is it when I need you, you’re never there? Why is it that I always think of you when I know I could never have you. Why is it that you torture me so with just your simple doings. Why is it that you can’t leave me alone? Why is it that I love to hear those words you say? Why is it that with those same words, it also makes me ache? Why is it that I so willingly do everything you ask me to? Why am I so stupid to even begin with? Why is it that I’m so afraid to say what I truly feel? Why is it even so hard to say it out? Why is it that you are giving me these illusions; I love them but in reality they are not even there? Why is it that I’m still waiting even though I know that you will never come? Why is it that you do not know of this? Why is it that you will never know?
Don’t make me hate you. Don’t make me miss you. Don’t make me love you. Don’t make me think of you. Don’t make me suffer. Don’t make me cry. Don’t make me beg you.
Please, don’t make me hate myself for loving you.

Teh Opening! ~Earth2025~

First post on one of the numerous idillic blogs that I'd ever signed up for. Woot! *cuts ribbons and officiates* Life's so far had been pretty fine beside assignments that are neverending and somehow they seem to pile up and CHOKE THE HELL OUT OF YOU and before you know it, you're GASPING for AIR, more like reaching for a GUN in your drawer, pushing it into your mouth and then PULLING THE TRIGGER.... ahhh..... Bliss~~~
Yeah, if that was an option. Ehem, that was a joke people. It's suppose to be funny...right? >.> <.<

Hehe... Let me introduce you to a recent game which had got me addicted, but not as bad as Gaia did.. hehe.. *drums rolling* Earth 2025!!

' Earth: 2025 is the first of a new generation of unique interactive games designed to be played directly on the web. Centrally located on the Swirve.com website, Earth: 2025 brings together tens thousands of players in an interactive gaming environment that's more addictive, entertaining, and engaging than anything you'll play against a computer or just a few opponents. You'll get the opportunity to take command of a fledging country and manage its economy, military, diplomacy and more as you try to make yourself the most powerful in the world'.

It's been 4 years since I'd first touched this game and i know nuts bout it.. yeah i was clueless and my clan leader wasn't that pleased >.<

At first I thought my country was going fine, until my friend, Eric told me that his country had a smaller land area, half my population, about twice the size of my military and his country networth is more than mine. HOW CAN THIS BE?! For each round I produced 35 Spies, 105 Troops, 105 Jets, 105 Turrets, 22 Tanks, and 292 Oil Barrels. I need more industrial complexes. So i decided to try something new. I sent spies to cause dissension within his country, twice. For each turn, about 500 of his troops ran away. I'd even sent spies to commit espionage where I'd stole some of his technology points. Bet he didn't realise that! LOL!! I was laughing while reading the statement. Then he IMed me,

Isarde: I'm going to shoot some deserters.
Sherli: LOL! Deserters?!
Isarde: My troops. They deserted my country for some reasons.
Sherli: LOL! I bet it's because of your 70% tax rate. They hate it so they left.
Isarde: Probably.

Hahahahha... I was laughing my head off. Sorry, Eric. *sweats* If you're reading this. It was just a mere small experiment. You had twice the number of troop I had.. 500 is nothing, right... Hehehe.. don't nuke my country pleease.. I still need you as my ally. *winks*

This tournament ends on the 29 of June and hopefully I'll still be alive in the game. LOL! Saw one of those advertising quotes which actually brought a smile to my face. Yeap.. Don't call my Shirley.. LOL.. sounds gay.



Surely you don't click ads? "I always click ads, and don't call my Shirley!".